Friday, January 1, 2010

Ending Ten Months of Silence

Wow. My last post is February 2009 and now it's January 2010. Happy New Year!

It isn't that I didn't learn anything interesting in that time. But it must have been more like drinking from a firehose than I realized because I didn't share any of that learning here.

In the spring semester I encountered systematic theology and was fortunate to be study with Dr. Paul Sponheim at Luther Seminary. We explored what statements we will make about God and volumes of what others have said including Carl Braaten, Robert Jensen, Elizabeth Johnson, and Ted Peters. I found my voice and the words to express what I understand about God, and a far-deeper appreciation for the mystery of God and all I do not, cannot, and may not ever, understand.

Alongside that coursework, I studied the Pentateuch. I confess: I spend more time in the Scripture when I have a class that digs into it. Beyond the commitment to the Shema that I posted about, I was also inspired by a new understanding that the Law was given as a gift to God's people, not as oppressive rules and regs. Reading the detail with which the Levites undertook their worship, I realized I had not appreciated the richness or intricacies of the traditions in Judaism.

The summer brought new studies that revealed a wholly new understanding of catholicity and mission in the church, and a long, slow swim through centuries of church history and the Reformation. I discovered the basis for many of the Episcopal traditions I experienced as a child, and then got to see their origins first-hand, visiting Oxford and Westminster in England in the late summer.

Before the fall semester intensified, I had the chance to meet and listen to Marcus Borg who was speaking at a local congregation. Heart of Christianity was one of the first books that helped me find expression for the encompassing love of God and I really enjoyed hearing him in person.

The months since then have been consumed with completing four months of clinical pastoral education (CPE). It was a transformative experience but one that I began very much feeling like a child playing dressup in a white labcoat. I was surprised at the void I felt from the absence of Lutheran traditions, enriched by sharing the experiences with colleagues, grateful for the blessing of being with families who celebrated their loved ones' lives, and yet heartbroken by some of the losses we experienced together.

As intense as CPE was, it was balanced against the foil of continuing coursework that dove deeply into the New Testament, exploring Matthew and Jesus' parables. It made me wish for more classes on the individual books of the Bible because the focused study creates an understanding of the book as a whole work, instead of the piecemeal glances we get in Sunday services, and the discussions allow more reflection and more opportunities to really soak in the texts.

With the new year dawning, I am headed into a new intensive at the seminary, new coursework and new discoveries. One of the classes - the Church and Music - has already put into words something I could only feel: "...the faith of a community comes to life in its music-making. In music, the faith and life of a people take flesh.”(Westermeyer, Te Deum, 5)

With each step, my awe and adoration for God deepens, as does my gratitude for his love for all his creation.

I'll close with a G.K. Chesterton quote that was shared with me in the New Year:
"The object of a new year is not that we should have a new year. It is that we should have a new soul."

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