When I hear this gospel, I cannot help but hear it in the context of church discipline; in our model constitution in the ELCA, these verses provide the framework for the discipline of church members. On our first hearing of the text, it comes across as “three strikes and you’re out” —a lot of law, not a lot of gospel, and, frankly, not a very interesting sermon text.
The first strike isn’t even the sin. While Jesus says these are the steps to take “if” someone sins against you, we know there’s no “if”. In our human condition, we will sin.
So, Jesus says that when another person sins against you, first you should address them one on one. If he or she cannot hear you, that’s strike one.
If they cannot hear you, then you should find two or three witnesses to accompany you and try again. If he or she still cannot hear you, that’s strike two.
The next step is to bring the matter before the church for resolution. And if he or she still cannot hear you, that’s strike three.
It is only after these three failed attempts – one on one, with witnesses and as the corporate body of Christ –that you treat the person as you would a Gentile or a tax collector.
Three strikes and you’re out.
But that doesn’t sound like the same Jesus who had just told his disciples in verse 14, “It is not the will of your Father in heaven that one of these little ones should be lost. (Matt. 18:14)
So this morning, I want to invite you to ask a couple of questions about the text, and then hear the text as if you have never heard it before.
The first question I want you to ask is , “Why is Jesus talking about this now?” Immediately before this he told the disciples the parable of the lost sheep where the shepherd leaves the 99 to find the lost one. And next week we will hear Peter ask how many times he should forgive. Matthew is the only gospel writer to include this conversation; we don’t know why the other gospel writers don’t include it, but it could suggest that Matthew was trying to address conflict that was happening in his community in the late first century.
The second question to ask is, “Who is Jesus talking to?” We know he’s talking to his disciples, but it’s helpful also to remember that what Matthew calls the church would have been small house churches of a dozen or so people who gathered together. Many of them might have been extended families. There weren’t congregations with hundreds, or even dozens, of people during Matthew’s lifetime. There were none of the denominations, confessional doctrines or even creeds that we associate with the capital-C Church today.
That’s also why in my reading, I used the words “brother or sister” instead of a “member of the church” which is what you find in the New Revised Standard Version translation in verse 15. The Greek word used here is ἀδελφός which actually means “brother”. Translating the word as “brother or sister” helps us remember that, in Christ, we are all adopted as children of God, siblings to one another, in one family.
So now, as we listen to this passage, instead of hearing it as policy for the institutional church, let’s try to hear Matthew speaking to the small communities and families of Jesus’ followers who were gathered around Word and Table.
While we like to imagine churches as places where peace and goodwill prosper, we know families squabble. Generations of family linked together by blood and DNA and church families too. That doesn’t surprise us and it didn’t shock Jesus either. Whenever there is a group of people gathered together there is going to be disagreement.
In our communities of faith we have used this text as prescriptive policy for church discipline. And, because Pharisaic law looked at Gentiles and tax collectors as either unclean or unrepentant and cast them out of community, we have heard this instruction as if Jesus was saying, “If the sinner doesn’t listen to you, cast them out.” Excommunicate them. Cut off fellowship with them. Banish them.
But again, does that sound like the Jesus you know?
When we look to Scripture to see how Jesus dealt with Gentiles and tax collectors, we see where tradition says that Matthew himself was a tax collector and yet he was called as one of the twelve apostles. (Matthew 10)
And Luke tells us Jesus called to Zacchaeus who was a chief tax collector and had dinner at his house. (Luke 19)
And the woman who spoke to Jesus a few weeks ago about the crumbs from the table was a Gentile. (Matthew 15:22)
So it turns out that Jesus did not cast out the Gentile or the tax collector, but instead broke bread with them, listened to their pleading, and loved them.
So when he tells his followers, “let such a one be to you like a Gentile or a tax collector”, perhaps what he is telling us is to love the person with the love of Christ.
What’s clear is that he does not say, “Break off relationship and never talk to them again.”
But all too often, in the church, we don’t follow Jesus’ teaching. We get it wrong from day one.
There are times we wound another person deliberately and the need for confession and forgiveness, and for reconciliation is obvious.
And there are circumstances, such as physical violence, murder or rape, when these gentler steps toward reconciliation do not apply.
But often, we may not know what we have done or how deeply we have hurt another person.
As we say in the confession at Compline, “Some of my sin I know – the thoughts and words and deeds of which I am ashamed – but some is known only to God.”
Someone may be wounded, and we may not be able to see the pain we have inflicted upon them.
Jesus would have the person who is wounded confront the person who sinned against them.
But that isn’t the way our world, or our congregations, function most of the time. Instead, the wounded person turns to a third person or a group of people and vents their anger and frustration there. We create triangles and talk about each other, instead of speaking directly with one another. We fastidiously avoid confrontation.
But here’s the thing, as Michael Chan writes, “to deny someone God’s corrective word is every bit as sinful as the deed under scrutiny.”[i] As siblings in Christ, we do not confront one another to point out sin and pile on shame, judgment and condemnation. Instead we are called to name the sin that we see so that the person may be convicted or “convinced and confident that [the evidence] is true.”
When we confront the sinner, our goal is conviction, not condemnation; conviction that leads to Godly sorrow and repentance.[ii]
When I discover that I have wounded someone else, either through reflection or because it is brought to my attention, it is painful because that isn’t how I want to love others.
But it is even more painful to discover too late that someone has been hurt and is suffering and I didn’t know. All too often when that happens the wounded person has churned in frustration, only to get fed up and break off relationship, angry, hurt and disillusioned. The path to reconciliation is much more difficult then.
In today’s gospel, Jesus offers us a way to be a community of Christ followers, reconciled with one another and united in faith.
Jesus doesn’t promise that we won’t hurt each other and that it won’t be messy – lives lived in relationship are going to be messy – but he promises that faithful and loving community in Christ is possible. In fact, this whole passage is about choosing the kind of community we want to be: divided or united.
The later verses are ones that we again often hear out of context. It’s hard to hear the Good News in Jesus’ promise that “if two of you agree on earth about anything you ask, it will be done” if you can recall a time when you prayed for something and your prayers went unanswered.
But in the context of pursuing reconciled relationships and restoration to community, what Jesus tells us is that if the two or three who have been in conflict can come together in prayer and be unified in faith, God is there with them and listening to their prayers.
The Good News that Jesus promises here is not that God will answer our prayers by giving us everything we ask, but that God cares about our relationships with one another, and is with us, even when we are in conflict. God is listening and watching and working in and through us, even in our brokenness and imperfections.
Instead of “three strikes and you’re out”, Jesus reminds us to “try, try and try again.”
Let us pray…
Good and gracious God,
Thank you for your Son Jesus who reconciles us to You and through whom we know mercy and forgiveness.
Teach us to live as siblings together in community, and love each other as Christ loves us.
Give us courage to boldly name our sin and pursue redemption and reconciliation with those who we hurt.
We pray in the name of Jesus Christ, our Savior and Lord.
Amen.
[i] Michael J. Chan. Dear Working Preacher. Luther Seminary.
[ii] Notes from lectures by Dr. Shanitria Cuthbertson in the NC Synod Racial Justice Network’s course “The Hidden Curriculum of White Supremacy”
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